The Lobster complex
"Let us try to grow and grow inside to overcome our blockages, change our behavior so that it can be reflected outside."
BE A BETTER LOBSTER
Françoise Dolto, in her work "Words for adolescents or The Lobster Complex" written with her daughter, Catherine Dolto-Tolitch, draws a parallel between adolescence and lobster.
Approaching adulthood, the lobster must get rid of its shell which has become too small, it then becomes extremely vulnerable and can neither defend itself nor flee in the face of danger throughout the solidification period of its new shell.
This transition, we all faced it during the transition to adolescence, in a more or less eventful way, depending on our social background, our education, our religion, so many determining parameters, which shaped and allowed us to to approach social life and the relationship with the other.
During this transition, we clearly leave our comfort zone, with habits, a set pace, a certain innocence to throw ourselves into the unknown of adulthood, with new perspectives, obligations, constraints, stress, the pressure of the gaze of the other, the competition ... This change can be uncomfortable and forces us to expose ourselves to the new with more or less violence and success, it is a critical period of evolution psychological and social.
Finally this parallel made with adolescence, can clearly transpose to the adult, we can be a lobster at any time of our existence, periods of great changes, transition, spiritual or intellectual evolution, d 'assertiveness. It is often very convenient to take refuge in its shell, this uncomfortable, cramped shell from which we have learned and accepted the borders, this shell so familiar, so reassuring that prevents us from evolving and growing in peace.
The hostility of our environment is very different from that of the lobster, which will have to hide at the cost of its life to survive, we will certainly be vulnerable, but only during the transition and consolidation of this new shell which will protect us and in which we can live fully.
It is up to us to make the necessary effort and to accept with benevolence the novelty that we have chosen, the unknown for which we will now be protected.